Three Roles In Interpersonal Communication

Communication between people can be divided into three different mindset, that is, parents' mentality, adult mentality and children's mentality.

There is such an example: three people have done business together, and finally they have lost their money. "They all blame you, they have no real ability to cooperate with you. It's really unfortunate to have a partnership with you!" said B: "I think there are several reasons for this loss. First, the three of us have different ideas. Two, there are also some objective obstacles in our work. C: "it's all my fault. I didn't do a good job. Please forgive me. I will correct it. Let's go on with it."

In this dialogue, a two elder colleague's accusation of the older generation is obviously a kind of parental mentality; B is very calm, like a steady and sensible person who belongs to the adult mentality; C is like a child, as if he had done something wrong, asking for forgiveness is just a child's mindset.

In fact, each of us has three roles in the self. When we are in the mindset of our parents, we have the idea of "what we must do" and "what we should do". There are two kinds of parents' mentality: one is to be mean to people, the other is to pick on others' shortcomings, and the other is to show people their emotions easily. A parent's mental attitude is in the form of parents. When we were young, how our parents loved us, what kind of parents' mindset we had when they grew up. When we are in an adult mindset, we seem calm, rational and objective. We do not criticize others, nor are we impetuous and willful. When we are in a child's state of mind, we behave emotionally, do things without considering the consequences, and are emotionally unstable and easily affected.

Almost everyone has had these three attitudes in the process of interacting with people, but the proportion is different. In life, we often encounter some fixed roles. People who are parents for a long time are very fond of criticizing others, or making suggestions to force you to accept them. Otherwise, they like to interfere in other people's lives and take care of you as children. Of course, those who can live with them for a long time can only be those "lifelong children". "Lifelong children" are those who have been in the minds of children for a long time. Even when they live to the age of fifty or sixty, they are just like a child.

They usually have no idea. They always rely on others for a long time. They often refuse to take responsibility, do things on impulse, and need other people's care and shelter in life. When interacting with people, they like to draw attention and win praise. People who are adults for a long time like pure logic thinking. They do things very well. reason They seldom talk about feelings and are often called "cold-blooded". They are seldom humorous in their lives, and their time is fully arranged. It is also very boring to get along with them.

From the above analysis, we will not lose face. Any role mentality that develops alone will make the development of our personality unbalanced. This directly affects whether our interpersonal relationship is normal.

So how do we adjust ourselves to three kinds of self? mentality Keep balance?

We must understand the proportion of three roles that we use in interpersonal communication. This requires you to record your role mentality in one week's interaction with people. When you concentrate on the investigation, the proportion of the three mindsets is very clear. After understanding the proportion of the three mindsets, we can consciously reduce the highest proportion of mentality in the interaction with others and improve the other two mindsets.

If you find yourself interacting with people often with your parents' mindset, you should pay attention to objective observation, learn to listen, criticize others, criticize others, and adopt the correct suggestions of others. Make your life more casual and sensual, and you will be much happier.

If you are a very reason People, you'd better lower your adult mentality. You can try to relax yourself and allow your feelings to be properly released. Suggest that you often watch some comedy or jokes to make yourself happy like children.

If you are often in a child's state of mind, you can better analyze calmly and avoid emotional problems. It is best to ask yourself "what do I want to do" without taking care of other people's preferences so as not to lose myself.

In interpersonal communication, each of us should pay attention to what we are in. mentality Find out the most appropriate role mentality and communication with people on different occasions. I believe you will have many friends and become a very popular person.